In Borrowed Shoes – Why this title?

Finding the title of my book was a huge challenge. The strings together 108 short vignettes of life. I chose this number based on the number of beads in a mala, which is what the Buddhists use to meditate and count the number of mantras they’ve said. It’s also a sacred number according to mathematician Leornardo Fibonacci as 108 represents the wholeness of existence.

This book is about walking towards my own wholeness. It is an invitation for the reader to walk towards his/her own wholeness by including all their experiences in life and owning them.

For a good chunk of time, I wanted to include 108 in the title of the book. I reached out to my Facebook community to ask them for ideas. I talked to friends. I researched what makes a good book title.

In the end, I stumbled upon one of my own stories titled, “In Borrowed Shoes,” and something about it made me pause and consider that this should be the title.

We walk through life “in borrowed shoes” for much of our lives. As we search for ourselves and our own meaning in life,  we try on other peoples’ identities.  Think about it. First, we try on our parent’s shoes and take on their ideas and values. Then we take on the values and ideas we learn in school. Then we take on ideas and values of our workplace, our spouses, our country, our religion.

As we start to make our own discoveries, we begin to get uncomfortable. We start to feel like the shoes we’ve been given don’t fit. The values and ideas and value systems we’ve taken on don’t work for us.

We squirm.
We fidget.

Our subconscious knows it’s dangerous to question and challenge the status quo. Life as we know it might fall apart.

And it often does when we begin to step into our own shoes. When we put on our own shoes there is no map, no set road, no forged path. We must trust our inner guidance. Trust our burning passion. Trust the unseen knowing that is moving us in a new direction.

For much of my life I felt uncomfortable in the shoes I’d been offered. I questioned religion. I didn’t believe in the Virgin birth (Catholic). I didn’t understand why all the priests were men. I didn’t imagine growing up, getting married, having kids and a white picket fence. I didn’t imagine having a corporate job.

But there was no road map for me. All I knew was I loved reading about other artists, writers, adventurers, the ones who risked social ridicule, risked being ostracized, risked a comfortable life to pursue their passion.

I’ve been searching my whole life for my own shoes. The comfortable ones. The ones that feel like me. and slowly and steadily I stepped into my own shoes. I found my path.

This book is about THAT journey. The slow, steady movement towards embracing the life I am here to live as the unique soul I am. That is my hope for everyone! That each of us lives the life we are here to live that is uniquely ours.

I offer these stories as a fellow traveler so that you, the reader, know you are not alone in your quest to bloom into yourself as fully as you can in the time you are given.