waves

Unraveling (April 2021)

tempImageMSQsaV.gif

It happened all at once
This letting go,
This unfurling of my cells
So tightly wound
And bound by fear. As though
If I worked harder,
Faster, more
Something would happen.

Faster.
Now.

It’s the great unraveling,
Arms flung open
Body buoyed on the 
Ocean’s rolling waves.

Fear floats out
Beyond the encasement 
Of my skin that gives me
Sovereignty to say “my and mine.”

Floating.
Drifting.
No oars.
A sea anemone unfurling, 

One last time, weeks ago,
I pushed through, powered through,
Only to feel my lungs burn, no,
To feel as through tiny shards of glass
Lined the inside of my breathing machine.

The energy escaped my body
Like a helium balloon deflating,
Leaving rest
As the only possibility.

tempImagev2UBom.gif

Floating and drifting 
From moment to moment
As the only next option
To see what shore
I will arrive upon
At some future moment.